Safety

In the interest of my safety my wife installed something to make sure I couldn't fall off my swing!!!!

The only problem was that she felt I was spending far too much time swinging!!!

Perfect

 When my wife's friend asked if I could be a model at her boutique for a couple of days my wife agreed, but only on the condition that no one could recognize me....

She said there was very little chance....and I have to agree.....

Been A While

"I'm very sorry Ma'am....you see I haven't been released from the cage in quite a while!!!"

Recommended

I would like to recommend this hotel....it's clean, centrally located and it offers the best wake-up service I've ever had!!!!!

Why

His friends all wondered why Tommy had joined the cheerleader squad....

Tommy wondered why all his friends hadn't joined.....there were so many little accidents like this and it was better when they were in their uniforms!!!!

You Know What They Say

 You know what they say....

Appearances can be deceiving!!!

But not in this case...

 

 

Searching

So....there's all these TV shows about people searching for Bigfoot....

I hope they find him....I really do....because I've got a few questions to ask that hairy bastard about that weekend that my wife claimed to be at a conference....